Monica suffers from insomnia following her breakup with Richard. Joey struggles to accept Chandler and Janice's relationship. Ross confides in Rachel about one of his fantasies. 莫妮卡失眠与李察分手后。我挣扎着接受我和珍妮丝的关系。罗斯告诉瑞秋关于他的一个幻想。
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- She totally winked at me! - She did not wink at you.
-那个女孩一定在跟我抛媚眼-才怪
You always think somebody's winking at you.
你总是以为别人在跟你抛媚眼
Huh.
I say "Tupelo Honey" by Van Morrison.
我会认为是范莫里生的《陶比洛密糖》
No way!
不会吧
The most romantic song ever was "The Way We Were."
我认为最浪漫的歌是《往日情怀》
Ah, I think the one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Who's the Boss?
我觉得是艾尔顿强帮演《妙管家》的人写的歌
- What song was that? - Um.
那是什么歌?
Hold me close, young Tony Danza
〝抱紧我,年轻的汤尼丹佐〞
- Hi, Monica. - Hi, Mon.
嗨,摩妮卡嗨,摩妮卡
Hey, Mon.
嗨,摩妮卡
Oh, my God!
天啊
- Has she slept at all? - Nope.
-她到底有没有睡过觉?一没有
It's been three nights in a row.
已经连续三个晚上了
She finally stopped crying yesterday.
从昨天起,她终于不哭了
But then she found one of Richard's cigar butts on the terrace...
但是她又在阳台发现理查抽过的雪茄
Oh. Okay, that explains it. I got a call at 2 in the morning...
好吧,这说明了为何我在清晨两点接到一通电话
...and all I could hear was this squeaky sound.
而我只能听到一些吱吱的声音
So I thought, "Oh, it's a mouse or a possum."
我就想〝一定是老鼠或负鼠〞
Then I realized, like, okay...
然后我就想,好吧…
...where would a mouse or a possum get the money to make the phone call?
老鼠或负鼠怎么会有钱打电话呢?
- Morning. - Morning. Hey.
一早一早,嘿
You made pancakes?
你做了煎饼啊?
Yeah, like there's any way I could ever do that.
是啊,你还以为我真的会做呢
Monica and Rachel had syrup
摩妮卡和瑞秋有糖浆
Uh, uh Now I can get my man to cheer up
现在我可以让我的男人开心了
Good morning, Joey.
早安,乔伊
Good morning.
早安
Here's a thought.
干脆这样吧
Why don't you stay home from work and just hang out with me?
你别去上班跟我在一起就好了
Oh, I wish.
是啊,但愿如此
You have that report to finish, and I've got to see my lawyer.
你有报告要做而我得去见律师
I can't believe I date a girl who's getting divorced.
我真不敢相信我竟跟要离婚的女生约会
- I'm such a grownup. - Ha-ha-ha.
我真像个大人
I gotta go, I gotta go.
我要走了…
Not without a kiss.
给我个吻才能走
Maybe I won't kiss you so you'll stay.
或者我就不亲你这样你就会留下来
Kiss her. Kiss her!
亲她
I'll see you later, sweetie. Bye, Joey.
再见亲爱的,拜,乔伊
Bye-bye, Janice.
再见,珍妮丝
So when are you dumping her?
你什么时候要甩掉她?
Nope.
不会
Not this time.
这次不会了
Heh. Come on, quit yanking me.
拜托,别整我了
I'm not yanking you.
我没有整你啊
- This is Janice. - Yeah, I know.
一这位可是珍妮丝一对,我知道
She makes me happy.
她让我很开心
Okay. All right.
好
You look me in the eye and tell me, without blinking...
你看着我的眼睛毫不犹豫地告诉我
...that you're not breaking up with her. No blinking.
说你不会跟她分手不准眨眼睛哦
I'm not breaking up with her!
我不会跟她分手
Ah!
What's that?
搞什么?
God, look what I found in the drain!
天啊,你看我在排水管里发现什么?
What?
什么?
It's some of Richard's hair!
这些是理查的头发
What do I do with this?
我该拿这些怎么办?
Getting it away from me would be job one.
第一件事就是把它从我身边拿开
It's weird, but I don't want to throw this away.
这么说有点奇怪但我并不想把它丢掉
This is all I have left of him.
这些是我仅有属于他的东西
Gross...
恶心的…
...drain hair.
排水管的头发
Ew!
Cool! Oh, it looks like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal.
真好玩,好像有一个小人在你的麦片里淹死了
- God, what is wrong with me? - You need to get some sleep.
-我是怎么了?-你需要一些睡眠
I need to get some Richard.
我需要的是理查
You broke up with him for a reason.
你跟他分手是有原因的
I know. I know. I'm just so tired of missing him.
我知道…我只是不想再这么想他
Tired of wondering why he hasn't called. Why hasn't he?
不愿再去想,他为何不打来?他为何都没打来?
Maybe because you told him not to?
可能因为你叫他别再打来?
What are you, the Memory Woman?
你到底是什么?记忆女王吗?
They're not breaking up! Chandler and Janice?
他们不会分手!我是说钱德和珍妮丝
They're not breaking up! He didn't blink!
他们不会分手!他连眼睛都没眨一下
I'm not surprised. Have you seen them together?
我一点也不惊讶你看过他们在一起的样子吗?
They're really cute.
他们真的好可爱
"Cute"? This is Janice!
〝可爱?〞那可是珍妮丝!
You remember Janice?
你记得珍妮丝吗?
Yes, I remember. She's annoying. But you know what?
我记得啊,她很惹人厌但是你知道吗?
She's his girlfriend now. I mean, what can we do?
她现在是他的女朋友那我们能怎么办?
There you go! That's the spirit I'm looking for! "What can we do?"
这就对了,我就是要这种精神〝我们能怎么办?〞
Huh?
All right, who's first, huh? Ross?
好,谁先来?罗斯?
Chandler's our friend, and Janice makes him happy.
钱德是我们的朋友而珍妮丝能让他快乐
So I say we be adult about it and accept her.
所以我们就成熟点,接受她
We'll call that Plan B.
这个先归类在B计划
Honey...
亲爱的
...I was wondering... - Mm.
我在想啊…
...do you still have that, um, Navy uniform?
你那套海军制服还在吗?
No, I had to return it to the costume place.
不,我拿去戏服店还了
Oh.
I think I have an old band uniform from high school.
我还有一套高中乐团的旧制服
You remember not having sex in high school, right?
你记得高中时没有做爱吧?
Yeah.
是啊
Well, honey, what about you?
亲爱的,那么你呢
- What? - I mean...
-什么啊?-我的意思是…
Do you have any fun, you know, fantasy-type things?
你有过任何有趣的幻想吗?
No.
没有
Come on. You gotta have one.
别这样,你一定有
Nope.
没有
- Ross, you know what? - What?
罗斯,你知道吗?
If you tell me, I might do it.
如果你跟我说或许我会帮你实现
Okay.
好吧
- Ahem. - Um.
Did you ever see, um, Return of the Jedi?
你有没有看过《星际大战:绝地大反攻》?
Yeah.
看过
Do you remember the scene...
你记不记得那个镜头…
...with, um, Jabba the Hutt?
当赫特族的贾霸出现时?
Jabba had as his prisoner...
贾霸和他的囚犯…
...Princess Leia.
莉亚公主
Oh.
Princess Leia was wearing...
莉亚公主穿着…
...this, um, gold bikini thing.
金色的比基尼
It was pretty cool.
那样还蛮酷的
Yeah, Princess Leia and the gold bikini? Oh, every guy our age loved that.
莉亚公主穿金色比基尼?我们这年纪的男人都很喜欢
- Really? - Mm-hm. Mm.
真的吗?
It's huge! That's the moment when she stopped being a princess...
很重要的!那个时刻,她不再是个公主
...and she became, like, you know, a woman.
她变成了一个女人
Did you ever do the Leia thing?
你曾扮过莉亚公主吗?
Oh, yeah. Mm-hm.
当然了
Really? That great, huh?
真的吗?有那么棒啊?
No, it's just that I got this new pager, and I have it on "vibrate."
不,只是我买了新的呼叫器我把它调成震动
See you.
再见
Hey.
嘿
Hi, you guys!
你们好啊
Look who I found standing outside the Szechuan Dragon...
看看我在四川龙餐厅外找到谁了
...staring at a parking meter.
她盯着停车收费表看
- Ahem. Mon. Hi. - Hi.
-摩妮卡-嗨
- Why aren't you at work? - Oh, they sent me home.
-你怎么没去上班?一他们把我送回家了
Why?
为什么?
Because I don't work at the Szechuan Dragon.
因为我并不是在四川龙餐厅上班
You really need to get some sleep.
你真的需要睡一下
I know I do.
我知道我需要
- Hi. - Hi.
嗨嗨
Guess what? They published my paper.
你猜发生了什么事?他们发表了我的论文
- Oh! Really? Let me see, let me see. - Uh-huh.
真的吗?让我看看…
Rach, look!
瑞秋,你看
No. - Ooh.
不
Hi. Ha, ha.
嗨
Ha, ha! Oh.
Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me?
我那强壮的罗斯天行者何时会来拯救我?
There he is!
他来了
- Hey. - Wheel!
-嘿-财富…
- Of! - Fortune!
-之… -轮
This guy's so stupid.
这个家伙好笨
It's Count Rushmore!
是罗斯摩尔伯爵啦
You should really go on this show.
你真的该去参加这个节目
I got three tickets to the Rangers tonight. What do you say?
我有三张今晚去看《游骑兵队》的票你觉得如何?
I say I am there!
我一定去
Cool! Oh.
太棒了
Is Ross going too?
罗斯也会去吗?
No. Janice.
不,是珍妮丝
Janice?
珍妮丝?
Because I just feel bad for Ross, you know?
因为我会替罗斯难过,你知道吗?
We always go together. We're like The Three Hockey-teers, you know?
我们总是一起去的我们是冰球三兄弟啊
I may be way out on a limb here, but do you have a problem with Janice?
也许是我误会你了?你是否反感珍妮丝?
No!
没有
Yes...
对啦…
Oh, God, how do I say this? Uh...
天啊,我该怎么说?
Oh! Ah!
You know that girl from the restaurant with the hair?
你知道希腊餐厅里那个头发很蓬的女孩子?
Ooh! That girl that I hate? Ugh! She drives me crazy. Ew.
那个我很讨厌的女孩子?她快把我逼疯了
Oh.
Look, I don't hate Janice. She's just a lot to take, you know?
听着,我不讨厌珍妮丝只是她令人难以忍受
- Well, there you go. - Oh.
你终于说出来了
Don't look at me like that.
别那样看着我
She drove you nuts before too, remember?
以前她也快把你逼疯了,记得吗?
I'm crazy about her now. This could be the real thing.
但是我现在为她疯狂这次可能是来真的
Capital R, capital T!
我是说〝真的〞
Don't worry, those are the right letters.
别担心,我语法没错
Look, what do you want me to say?
你到底要我说什么?
I want you to say that you like her!
我要你说你喜欢她
I can't. It's like this chemical thing, you know?
我说不出来这像是一种化学作用
Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna...
每次她一开始笑,我就想…
...pull my arm off so I have something to throw at her.
想把我的手臂拔下来我就能往她身上砸
Thanks for trying.
谢谢你的努力
Oh, and by the way, there is no Count Rushmore!
对了,根本就没有罗斯摩尔伯爵!
Then who's the guy that painted the faces on the mountain?
那是谁在罗斯摩尔山上塑了那些总统肖像?
- Ugh. - How could you tell her?
你怎么可以告诉她?
I didn't think it would be that big a deal!
我想又没什么大不了的
Oh. She didn't think it would be a big deal!
她认为没什么大不了的?
Who are you talking to when you do that?
你在跟谁讲话?
Look, that was supposed to be a private, personal thing between us.
这些应该是我们之间很私密的对话
Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay? We tell each other everything.
菲比是我的闺密,好吗?我们无话不谈的
Guys do the same thing.
男人也一样啊
I mean, what about all that locker-room stuff?
那些更衣室里的谈话呢?
That's different. That's like, uh, who dated a stripper?
那不一样,我们会谈像是谁跟脱衣舞娘约会
Or who did it on the back of the Staten Island ferry?
或谁在史坦登岛渡轮后面做爱
- Both of those Joey? - Yeah.
一这两个都是乔伊吧一是啊
But you don't talk about your girlfriend...
但我们不谈自己的女友…
...and the intimate stuff you do with her.
还有和女友之间做的亲密的事
- Not even with your best friend? - No.
一连最好的朋友也不谈?一不啊
That is so sad.
真可悲啊
You're missing out on so much.
你们错过太多乐趣了
I mean, the bonding and the sharing...
那是种交心与分享的感觉…
...and knowing they're going through the same thing you are.
并知道他们也和你经历过一样的事
Oh. So, what, you tell each other everything?
那你们什么都跟对方说吗?
Pretty much.
差不多啊
Did you talk about the Night of Five Times?
你们有没有谈过那次一夜五次的事?
Do you tell people about the Night of Five Times?
你有没有告诉她们那次一夜五次的事?
Uh, honey, that was with Carol.
亲爱的,你那次是跟卡萝
I know, but it's still worth mentioning, I think.
我知道,我想还是值得一提
Relax every muscle in your body.
全身肌肉放松
Listen to the plinky-plunky music.
听着叮叮咚咚的音乐
Okay, now close your eyes...
好,闭上你的眼睛
...and think of a happy place.
想一个很愉快的地方
Tell me your happy place.
告诉我让你快乐的地方是哪里
Richard's living room, drinking wine.
理查家的客厅,一起喝红酒
No, no, no. Not a Richard thing. Just put down the glass and get out.
不…不可以跟理查有关把酒杯放下,快出来
I'm sorry, but that's my happy place.
对不起,那是让我快乐的地方
Okay, fine. Use my happy place. Just don't move anything in there.
好,我的快乐地方借你用但别弄乱
I'll try not to.
我会试着不乱动
Okay. All right, so, you're in a meadow...
好,你现在在草地上…
...millions of stars in the sky...
天上有一片繁星
You think breaking up was a mistake?
你觉得分手是错误的吗?
There are no questions in the happy place.
快乐的地方不准问问题
Just the warm breeze and the moonlight flowing through the trees.
只有和煦的微风和从树上撒下的月光
I'll bet he's over me. I'll bet he's fine.
我赌他一定忘了我我打赌他好得很
Betting and wagering of any kind are not permitted in the happy place.
快乐的地方不允许赌博和下注
Okay?
好吗?
There's just, you know, the lovely waterfalls...
那里只有…美丽的瀑布
...and the trickling fountains...
和缓陵流动着的喷泉
...and the calming sounds of the babbling brook.
还有低声轻语的小溪产生平静的音律
- Okay, this isn't working. - Oh.
好,一点用也没有
I'm still awake, and now I have to pee.
我还是醒着的而且我得去上厕所
Oh.
So I hear...
我听说…
...you hate me!
你讨厌我
I, uh, never said hate. I was very careful about that.
我没说我讨厌你我可是很小心的
A little birdie told me you wanting to rip your arm off and throw it at me.
有人私下告诉我你想扯下手臂,丢到我身上
And you got "hate" from that? You're taking a big leap there, I, uh...
这样你就觉得我讨厌你?你也太断章取义了吧
All right, fine, fine, fine!
好吧
We have got to do something about our little situation here.
这种情形,我们得想点策略
So this is my idea.
这是我的主意
You and me spending some quality time together.
你和我花点时间,好好相处
But what does that...?
但是那有什么关系…
For Chandler!
为了钱德
Okay. I'm in.
好吧,我加入
Okay! This is what we'll call it: Joey and Janice's Day of Fun!
好!这就叫做乔伊和珍妮丝的快乐一日游
Does it have to be a day?
真的要一整天吗?
Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
因为如果要你爱上我得花上一整天
Yeah, I know. Ha. I sleep in the next room.
是,我知道我睡在你们的隔壁
I went down to the post office...
我今天去了邮局
...and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered...
寄来的是我订的录影带
...for Richard about the Civil War.
是帮理查订的有关内战的
He loved the Civil War.
他很喜欢看内战电影
Do you want us to take you home?
你要不要我们带你回家?
Uh-huh.
Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away.
带我到遥远的银河去吧
Women tell each other everything. Did you know that?
女人什么事都聊,你知道吗?
Ha, ha. Yeah.
知道
No, Chandler, everything.
不,钱德,我是说全部的事
Like stuff you like. Stuff she likes.
你喜欢的东西,她喜欢的东西
Technique. Stamina. Girth.
技巧,精力,腰围
Girth?
腰围?
Why? Why? Why?
为什么…?
Why would they do this?
她们为何这样做?
Rachel says sharing's great and supposedly...
瑞秋说分享的感觉很棒,而…
...we ought to be doing it.
我们也应该这么做
Uh, do you want to?
你想要吗?
- We're not gonna talk about girth? - No.
-我们不会要讨论腰围吧?-那倒不是
- Yeah. Okay. Yeah. - Yeah?
一好吧一好?
All right, you go first.
好,你先吧
- Okay. Okay, I'll go first. - Okay.
一好,我先说一好
So, uh, the other night...
有天晚上…
...Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies...
瑞秋和我在床上讨论彼此的性幻想
...and I happened to describe a particular...
我就形容了一个画面…
...Star Wars thing...
《星际大战》里的…
- Princess Leia and the gold bikini. - Yes.
-莉亚公主和金色比基尼-没错
- I know! - Yes.
-我就知道一是啊
Whoa. Wow.
- Well, that was easy. Ha, ha. - Ha, ha.
这倒挺容易的
Okay, you go.
好,换你了
- Okay. - Okay.
一好一来吧
Okay, you know when you're in bed with a woman...
好,当你跟一个女人在床上…
Uh.
...and, uh, ahem, you know, you're fooling around...
正在亲热…
...and you get all these mental images in your brain?
脑袋里突然出现一些疯狂的念头
Like Elle MacPherson or the girl at the Xerox place?
就像超级名模艾尔或是影印店的那个女孩吗?
- With the bellybutton ring? Oh. - Oh! I know.
-穿了肚脐环的那个?-我就知道
And then all of a sudden, your mom pops into your head.
但是突然之间你忽然想到你妈
And you're, like, "Mom, get out of here!"
然后你就想〝妈,快走开啦!〞
But after that, you can't think of anything else.
当然,这之后你就完全没情绪再想其他人了
And you can't stop what you're doing. So it's kind of like you're...
而你正在做的事又不能停止所以你就好像…
...you know, you know...
你知道…
You don't know!
你不知道
Your mom?
你妈妈?
You're telling me about your mom? What's the matter with you?
你是说跟你妈一起?你究竟有什么毛病?
- You said... - I said "share," not "scare"!
-你说…-我说要〝分享〞,不是〝吓唬人〞
Go sit over there!
你给我坐到那边去
- We're back! - Hey.
我们回来了
What are you guys doing together?
你们俩在一起干嘛?
Joey and Janice's Day of Fun!
乔伊和珍妮丝的快乐一日游
- Really? - Yeah, yeah.
-真的吗?一是啊
We went to a Mets game. We got Chinese food.
我们去看《纽约大都会》的比赛还吃了中国菜
And, uh, you know, I love this woman. Ha-ha-ha.
你知道的,我爱这个女人
You have got competition, buddy.
你有竞争对手了,兄弟
Well, I just came by to give you a kiss.
我只是上来亲你一下
Mwah.
I have to go pick up the baby. So I'll see you later, sweetheart.
我得去接孩子了等一下见,甜心
You too, Chandler.
你也是,钱德
- You still can't stand her, can you? - I'm sorry, man. I tried! I really did!
-你还是受不了她,是吗?-抱歉,我已尽最大努力了
I appreciate you giving it a shot.
还是谢谢你的努力
But you know, the good thing...
但是有一点可喜的是…
...is that we spent the whole day together and I survived.
我们整天在一起而我还能存活
And what's even more amazing, so did she. Ha, ha.
更了不起的是,她也做到了
It was Bat Day at Shea Stadium.
今天是《大都会》主场的球棒日
I guess that's something.
我想这还蛮了不起的
Oh, man, that's huge!
天啊,这可是大事呢
Now I know I can stand to be around her. Which means...
现在我知道我可以待在她旁边,表示…
...I get to hang out with you.
我可以和你一起出去…
Which is kind of the whole point anyway. Ha, ha.
反正这就是我的重点
Okay.
好吧
Oh, hey! We, uh, stopped by the coffee shop and, uh, ran into Ross.
我们在咖啡店停了一下结果遇到罗斯
Oh, God.
天啊
If it makes you feel any better, I do it too.
希望这会让你好过点我也会有这种想法
Oh.
- Really? - Oh, yeah!
-真的?一是啊
I always picture your mom when I'm having sex.
当我在做爱时一直都会想象你妈的样子
April 12, 1861.
1861年4月12日
The United States garrison at Fort Sumter was fired upon.
美国在山德堡的部队受到炮轰
It is now under bombardment by...
这场炮轰是由于…
Dad, what are you doing here?
爸,你怎么来了?
It's your mother's bridge night, so I came into the city for a Moni-cuddle.
你妈今晚打桥牌所以我进城来抱抱摩妮卡
Oh.
Since when did you start smoking cigars?
你什么时候开始抽雪茄了?
I don't. I just like the smell of them.
我没有,只是喜欢闻它的味道
So, uh, what are you really doing here?
你来这里真正的目的是什么?
I just wanted to make sure you're okay.
我只想确定一下你没事
Why wouldn't I be okay?
我为什么会不好呢?
I saw Richard.
我看到理查了
Oh?
So how you doing?
你还好吗?
I'm fine.
我很好
I'm just a little tired, but I'm okay.
我只是有点累但我很好
- Ahem. How's Richard doing? - You don't want to know.
-理查怎么样了?-你不会想知道的
No, I really, really do.
我真的很想知道
Well, he's doing terrible!
他的情况很糟
Really?
真的?
Worse than when he broke up with Barbara.
比他跟芭芭拉分手时还糟
- You're not just saying that, are you? - No, the man is a mess!
-你不是故意这么说的吧?-那个男人简直一团糟
- Was he crying? - No.
-他有没有哭?一没有
Do you think he was waiting till after you left, so he could cry?
你觉得他是否等你走后才开始哭?
Maybe.
或许吧
I think so.
我想也是
Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your mom and me.
宝贝,感情这回事很难说就像我跟你妈
You know, after we graduated from college, we broke up for a while.
大学毕业后我们曾分手一阵子
It seems her father, your grandfather...
她父亲,就是你外公,似乎…
...wanted her to travel around Europe like he did.
希望你妈跟他一样到欧洲四处旅行…
Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam's nickel...
当然,他花的是美国政府的钱
...because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time.
因为当时他也在猛轰德列车
However...
然而…
Okay, here we go.
好吧,开始罗
I am Jabba's prisoner. And you...
我是贾霸的囚犯,而你…
...have a really weird look on your face.
你脸上的表情好怪
What? Honey, what is it?
怎么了,亲爱的?有什么问题?
Did I get the hair wrong?
我的头发不对吗?
Or what? Did you just picture it differently? What?
还是别的问题?跟你想像的不同,还是…?
No, no. It's, um... It's not you. It's, um...
不是你的问题,是…
What is it? Come on, sweetie. You're, like, freaking me out here.
怎么了?拜托,甜心你快把我吓坏了
I hate Chandler. The bastard ruined my life!
我恨死钱德了那个王八蛋毁了我的人生