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老友记/六人行/Friends 第五季 第十一集 S05E11 The One with All the Resolutions / 新年新气象

老友记/六人行/Friends 第五季 第十一集 S05E11 The One with All the Resolutions / 新年新气象

The gang make their New Years resolutions. Chandler struggles to not make jokes about everyone. Rachel uncovers a secret. Ross runs into trouble when he wears leather pants on a date. 刚让他们的新年决议。钱德勒挣扎不开玩笑的人。瑞秋发现了一个秘密。罗斯陷入麻烦时,他穿着皮裤约会。


链接: 密码:j5cd


All right. Here we go. 1999, the year of Joey.
来罗!1999年 乔伊"快乐"的一年

We're very happy for you.What's the matter?
恭喜你 怎么了?

We wanted to kiss at midnight, but nobody else is going to so, you know...
我们想在午夜接吻 但其他人都没这个打算

- All right, I'll take care of it. - Oh, no.
好 交给我


33 32, 31. - Ross, Ross, Ross.
33! 32 ! 31!罗斯 !

Listen, who are you kissing at midnight? Rachel or Phoebe?
你0点要亲谁? 瑞秋还是菲比?

- What? - Well, you gotta kiss someone. you can't kiss your sister.
什么? 你得亲人 又不能亲你妹

- Who's gonna kiss my sister?- Chandler.
那谁要亲我妹? 钱德

- Oh, man. Really?

Who would you rather have kiss your sister?me or Chandler?
老兄 你觉得谁比较好 我还是钱德?

- That's a good point. - Yeah.

Uh, well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
我和瑞秋有太多纠葛 那就菲比吧

Okay, great.

Pheebs, Pheebs. Listen. Ross wants to kiss you at midnight.

So obvious. Why doesn't he just ask?
太明显了 他大可直说

Rach, Rach. Listen, I'm going to kiss you at midnight.- What?
瑞秋!我午夜要亲你 什么?

Well, everyone's gotta kiss someone.- You can't kiss Ross. You got the history.
大家都得找人亲 你亲罗斯会小尴尬

- So? - So?Who would you rather have kiss you, me or Chandler?
所以呢? 所以你想让我亲还是让钱德亲

- Oh, good point.
有道理 对吧

Three, two, one.Happy New Year!
3 ! 2 ! 1!新年快乐!

- Happy New Year. - Happy New Year.
新年快乐 新年快乐

- Happy New Year, Pheebs. - You too.
菲比 新年快乐 你也是

Happy New Year, Joey.
乔伊 新年快乐

So that do anything for you?

You know what?I'm going to go out on a limb and say, "No divorces in '99."
你们知道吗?我要召告天下 99年我不离婚

But your divorce isn't even final yet.

Just the one divorce in '99.
99年我只离一次婚 漂亮

You know what? I'm gonna be happy this year.I'm gonna make myself happy.
我今年要过得很快乐 我要让自己快乐

Do you want us to leave the room or?

Every day, I am going to do one thing I have never done before.

That, my friends, is my New Year's resolution.

- Ooh. That's a good one. Mine is to pilot a commercial jet.
好棒的希望 我是想开大型客机

That's a good one too. Now you only have to find a planeload of people...
这个也很棒 接着你得找一群

...whose resolution is to plummet to their deaths.

Maybe your resolution should be not to make fun of your friends.

Especially the ones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free...on their own plane

She has a better chance of sprouting wings and flying up your nose...than you do of not making fun of us.
她开飞机的机率 比你不取笑我们还高

In fact, I'll bet you 50 bucks you can't go the whole year without making fun of us.

You know what? Better yet, a week.I'll take that bet, my friend.
干脆1星期好了 我赌了

And you know what? Paying me the 50 bucks can be...the "new thing you do" that day.
输我那50元 就可以当你的"每日新鲜事"

And it starts right now.

All right, my New Year's resolution is to learn how to play guitar.

- Really? How come?

You know those special skills I have listed on my résumé?
我的履历表 不是列了一堆特殊专长

I would love it if one of those was true.

Do you want me to teach you? I'm a great teacher.
你要我教你吗? 我是个很好的老师

Really? Who have you taught?

Well, I taught me and I loved me.
我教过我 我很喜欢我

That'd be great. Yeah, thanks, Pheebs.
太好了 谢谢你

Oh, look. Blaire forgot her glasses.She's gonna be needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend.
克莱儿忘了把眼镜带走 她需要这副眼镜来盯住男朋友

Who, from what I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
听说他得把订书机收在收屉里 你们懂我的意思吧

Hey, Rach, maybe your resolution should be to, um, gossip less.

What? I don't gossip.

Maybe sometimes I find out things.Or I hear something and I pass that information on.
或许我偶尔会发现一些事 或听到一些事 然后转述出去

You know, kind of like a public service.

Doesn't mean I'm a gossip. I mean, would you call Ted Koppel a gossip?
这并不代表我很八卦 你们会说新闻主播八卦吗?

Well, if Ted Koppel talked about his coworkers' botched boob jobs...yeah, I would.

Well, they were like this.

- I'll see you tomorrow. - Okay.
那就明天见 好

I just asked that girl out.- Nice. - Nice. Yeah.
我约刚才那个女生出去 漂亮

Is that part of your resolution, your "new thing" for today?

Yes, it is. See?
没错 你们看


That's right.Elizabeth Hornswoggle.


You okay, Chandler? Is there something funny about that name?
你还好吗? 这个姓有哪里好笑吗?

No, no, I just think that maybe I've heard it somewhere before.
没有 我只是觉得好像听过

Oh, really? Where?Somewhere funny I'll bet.
是吗?在哪里听过? 一定是个很好笑的地方

- Hey, Pheebs. Guess what? - Hey.

Uh, I have a date with, uh, Elizabeth Hornswoggle.
我要跟一个伊丽莎白… 宏史歪哥约会

Hornswoggle?Oh, this must be killing you.

- All right, see you later. - See you.

All right, Pheebs, I am ready for my first lesson.
菲比 我可以上第一课了 好

Okay. Oh, no, no, you don't touch the guitar.
不行 不能碰吉他

No, no. First you learn here, then you learn here.
先练手 再练琴

- Oh. Okay.

- Okay. Lesson One: Chords.
好 第一课 和弦

Now, um, I don't know the actual names of the chords, um...

But I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them.

So then, this is "Bear Claw."

Okay, "Turkey Leg"...

...and "Old Lady."

What an interesting approach to guitar instruction.

You know, some might find it amusing. I myself find it regular.
有些人可能会觉得好笑 我觉得很普通

Hey, everybody.Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.
各位 瑞秋今天很乖 她都没有八卦

I didn't. Even when I found out, um...
没错 即使我发现…

All right, let's just say I found out something about someone...and let's just say...she's gonna keep it.
总之我发现了某人的某件事 但是我不会说出来

Hey, Pheebs. Check this out.
菲比 你看

Ooh. You nailed the Old Lady. Oh!

Hey, listen, I thought I was getting on my way home today I stopped by this guitar store...
我觉得我进步了 就在回家的路上去吉他店…

Did you touch any of the guitars while you were there?

Did you?


Give me your hands.

琴弦 这一手


Do you want to learn to play guitar?- Yes.
你想学吉他吗? 想啊

- Then don't touch one!

- Hi, Ben. - Auntie Monica.
班 摩妮卡姑姑

Ross is wearing leather pants.

Does nobody else see that Ross is wearing leather pants?

Someone comment on the pants.

- I think they're very nice. - I really like them a lot.
很帅气啊 我很喜欢

Not what I had in mind.

See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants.

You see, they're very tight.

Maybe there's something in that area?

- I think they look really good. - I like them.

Yeah, where did you get them?

See, I needed a new thing for today.

And there's this leather store I go by that always smells so good.

And I thought to myself, "Wow. You know, I've never owned a really good-smelling pair of pants before."
于是我心想 我从来没买过一条很香的皮裤

Oh, come on.

Okay, seriously. What do you think?
说真的 你们觉得怎样?

-You look like a freak. Yeah, awful. -Awful.
好怪 难看死了

Hey. What are you doing? What are you doing?

- It's my New Year's resolution. - To blind my child?
这是我的新年新希望 把我儿子弄瞎?

No, to take more pictures of all of us together.
不 是多照照我们的相片

I really think it's the best resolution. Everyone can enjoy them.
我觉得这样最好 大家都会喜欢

Well, everyone will enjoy my music as well.

-My God, these pants. I'm burning up.
天哪 这条裤子热死了

Oh, God. She wants to snuggle now? What, is she trying to kill me?It's like a volcano in here.
她现在靠过来是想让我死吗? 这里面跟火山一样

- Are you hot? - No.
你热吗? 不会

Okay, it must just be me then.

That was just the pants and the couch.

Um, hey, do you mind if I use your bathroom?

- Oh, go ahead. - Thanks.
请便 谢谢

-Hey, my favorite part's coming up.
我最喜欢的部分要来了 好

Oh, my God!

Tiger. Dragon.Iceberg.
老虎 恐龙 冰山

Joseph, did you even study at all last night?
乔瑟夫 你昨晚有练习吗?

- Yes. Yes, I did. - Then do Iceberg.
我有啊 那就把冰山做出来

- G-sharp. - G-sharp?
升G 升G ?

Have you been studying the real names of the chords?

Have you?

Oh, my God.

What? I didn't touch a guitar.No, but you're questioning my method.
怎样?我又没有碰吉他 但是你质疑我的教学方式

No, I'm not questioning it, Phoebe. I'm saying it's stupid.
我不是质疑 我根本就觉得很蠢


Thank you.

You know, none of my other student...thought I was stupid.

Your other student was you!

Yeah, well, you know, maybe you just need to try a little harder.
那又怎样 也许你应该更用功

Maybe I need to try a real teacher.

Right here. Here. Andy Cooper. He teaches guitar.
这袒 安迪古柏 他在教吉他

And look. Ooh, there's a picture of him with a kid.

Yeah, and the kid's got a guitar!

Fine. You go learn from your qualified instructor.
好 你去跟你的专业老师学

But don't come crying to me when everyone is sick and tired...of hearing you play "Bad, Bad Leroy Brown."
等大家听腻"坏蛋李洛布朗" 你可别哭着来找我

Baddest man in the whole damn town

Oh, fine. Take his side.
好啊 你去帮他啊

I can't wait to be with you.

I'll sneak over as soon as Ross picks up Ben.

I'll tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple hours.
我会告诉瑞秋 我要洗两个小时衣服

Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname?

You know what your nickname is, Mr. Big...
不是 你明知你的绰号是大鹏

- Hello? - Joey, it's Ross. I need some help.
喂? 乔伊 我是罗斯 我需要帮忙

Uh, Chandler's not here.Well, you can help me.
钱德不在 你可以帮我

- Okay.

- Listen.I'm in Elizabeth's bathroom.


No, I got really hot in my leather pants so I took them off.
不是 我觉得皮裤很热 就进来脱掉

But they must have shrunk from the sweat or something.Or my legs expanded from the heat.
结果它一定是遇汗缩水 或是我的腿因热膨胀

I can't get them back on, Joey. I can't.

Oh. That is quite a situation.

Uh, do you see any, like, powder?

Powder. Yeah, yeah, I have powder.
有 我有爽身粉

Good, good. Okay.Sprinkle some on your legs. It'll absorb moisture.Then you can get your pants back on.
很好 把它撒在腿上吸汗 就能把裤子穿回去了

Yeah, hold on.
好 等一下

They're not coming on, man.

Um, you see any...? Oh, Vaseline?

I see lotion. I have lotion. Will that work?
我找到乳液 我有乳液 乳液行吗?

- Yeah, sure, throw some of that on there. - Hold on.
行 把它涂在腿上 等下

Ross, you okay?

They're still not coming on, man.And the lotion and the powder have made a paste.
裤子还是拉不上来 而且乳液和爽身粉糊成一团

Really?Uh, what color is it?

What difference does that make?

Well, if the paste matches the pants,

you can make yourself paste pants...and she won't know the difference.
你就糊一条假裤子 她就看不出来了

Joey, do you have a minute?
乔伊 你有空吗?

Dude, what am I...?

Rachel's here, so good luck, man. Let me know how it works out.
瑞秋来了 祝你好运 让我知道结果

Oh, Joey, I have such a problem.
乔伊 我遇到天大的问题

Oh, well, your timing couldn't be better.I'm putting out fires all over the place.
你来得正好 我正在到处救火

Okay, okay. Joey, I have got to tell you something.
好 乔伊 我得告诉你一件事

What is it? What is it?

Oh, my God. It's so huge. But you have to promise me, you cannot tell anyone.
天哪 这件事太大条了 但你得保证不说出去

- No, no, no. I don't want to know. - What?
不要 我不想知道

Yes, yes, yes. You do want to know. This is unbelievable.
你绝对想知道 太不可思议了

I don't care, Rach. Look, I'm tired of being the guy who knows all the secrets...and can't tell anyone.
我不管 我不想再当知道秘密 却不能说的人

You know secrets? What are they?

And you're not supposed to be gossiping.

No, I know, I can't keep this in. So I pick up the phone...
我知道 但这件事我恋不住 我刚才拿起电话…

I'm not listening to you.

Ross? Um...You've been in there for a long time.
罗斯 你进去很久了

I'm starting to get kind of freaked out.

All right, I'm coming out.
好 我要出去了

Hey, can you turn the lights off?

No. Let's just leave the lights on.
不行 灯就让它开着

Oh, my God.

I had a problem.

Hey, Pheebs.

Oh, I can't talk to you. I don't have a fancy ad in the yellow pages.
我不能跟你说话 我没在电话簿上登广告

Look...Pheebs, I just...
菲比 你听我说…

I want to apologize for saying your method was stupid.

And maybe, ask you to be my teacher again?

And I promise, I won't touch a guitar until you say I'm ready.
在你说可以之前 我绝对不碰吉他

- You really think I'm ready? - Uh-huh.

Wow, cool.

- Was the chord at least right before...? - No.
那个和弦弹对了吗? 不对

Oh my God.

We heard about your pants. I'm so sorry.
我们听说了 好惨

This year was supposed to be great.

Well, it's only the second day, and I'm a loser...with stupid leather pants that don't even fit.
才第二天我就成了 穿不合身的皮裤的逊人

You're not a loser.
没这回事 你不逊

Look at me.

Hey, look. Look, Ross.Ben drew a picture of you.
你看 班画了你的画像

Huh? You're a cowboy.

Oh.Because of the leather pants?

Ben doesn't think you're a loser. He thinks you're a cowboy.I mean, that's something.
班并不觉得你逊 他觉得你是牛仔 很棒吧

It really is something. -Howdy, partner. Hey.
真的很棒 牛仔哥

Maybe I should get another pair.

Ooh, you know, they had some...with fringe all down the sides.

I'm gonna go kiss Ben good night.

I can't believe he thinks I'm a cowboy.

I would make a good cowboy.

Okay, now that everything's wrapped up here, I'm gonna go do my laundry.
好 既然没事 我要去洗衣服了

Yeah, me too. You know, if this shirt is dirty. .
我也是 如果这一件脏了的话


Okay, I'm gonna go to.

I'm gonna go to the airport. I figure if I hang around there long enough, someone's bound to leave one of those planes unattended.
我要去机场 只要等久一点 应该能逮到没人管的飞机

- Good luck, honey. -Bye.
祝你好运 再见

Hey, uh, Joey, remember that big thing I was going to tell you about?
乔伊 记得我要说的那件大事吗?

I'm not gonna tell you. But if you found out on your own...
我不会告诉你 但如果你自己发现

...that would be okay, and then we could talk about it, right?
那就没关系 我们就可以讨论了对吧?

Well, then it wouldn't be a secret. So, yeah, that would be okay. Yeah, yeah.
那样就不是秘密 的确没关系

Hey, Joe, would you mind going over into Chandler's bedroom...and getting that book back that he borrowed from me?
乔伊 你去钱德的房问 把我借给他的书拿回来好吗?

Now? You want me to go over there now?Yeah.
现在?你要我现在去? 对

- Do you know something? - Do you know something?
你知道什么吗? 你知道什么吗?

- I might know something. - I might too something too.
我或许知道 我也是

- What's the thing you know?I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
你知道什么? 不行 你先说我才能说

I can't tell what I know. Well, I can't tell what I know.
我不能说 那我也不能说

Okay, fine.

You don't know.

How about I go there and walk into Chandler's bedroom and see the thing...that I think I know is actually the thing I think I know.
不如我现在就去钱德的房问 就可以知道我想的确实没错

- You know. - And you know.
你知道 你也知道

Yeah, I know.
对 我知道

Chandler and Monica? Oh, this is unbelievable.
钱德和摩妮卡? 真叫人不敢相信

- How long have you known? - Too long. Oh, my God.
你知道多久了? 太久了

Rach, I've been dying to talk to someone about this for so long.
天哪 我早就想找人说了

Listen, listen. You can't say anything to anybody. They're so weird about that.
听着 我们不能告诉别人 他们两个好紧张…

Hey, Phoebe. - Hey.

It's raining. I don't like to fly in the rain so...
在下雨 我不想在下雨天飞

Oh, I am going to go for a walk in the rain. Ha, ha.

Oh, yeah, me too.

That's weird.

I bet they're doing it.

Oh, good. Okay, look. I can't take it anymore. I can't take it anymore.
好 我扛不住受不了了

So you win. Okay? Here.
你赢 好吗?拿去

Pheebs? Flying a jet? Better make it a you can get back to your home planet.
菲比 开飞机? 不如开太空船回你的星球去

And Ross. Phone call for you today. Tom Jones. He wants his pants back.
罗斯 有你的电话 汤姆琼斯跟你要他的裤子

And Hornswoggle? What, are you dating a character from Fraggle Rock?
宏史歪哥? 你在跟卡通人物约会吗?

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