Chandler continues to pretend to hate the idea of marriage, unaware Richard wants Monica back. Meanwhile, Rachel and Phoebe discuss their 'back-up' plans. 钱德勒继续假装恨结婚的想法,不知道李察想摩妮卡回来。与此同时,瑞秋和菲比讨论他们的后备计划。
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What? What did you What?
什么?你刚才 什么?
I still love you.
我仍然爱着你
And I know I probably shouldn't even be here telling you this
我知道我甚至不该来这里告诉你
I mean you're with Chandler a guy I really like,
你跟钱德在一起 我很喜欢他
You say he's straight, I'll believe you.
你说他是异性恋 我就相信你
After seeing ya the other night I knew if I didn't tell ya I'd regret it for the rest of my life.
但见到你之后 我知道我不说 会后悔一辈子
Letting you go was the stupidest thing I ever did.
放弃你是我所做过最蠢的事
Y'know you're really not supposed to be back here!
你不该到厨房来的
I'm sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrong place,but
我知道 对不起 我知道时机地点都不对 但是
I had to tell you.
我一定要说
I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you.
我想跟你共度一生 我想娶你
I want to have kids with you.
我想跟你生儿育女
Oh, my God.
我的天哪
Why don't they put chairs back here?
这里为什么没摆椅子?
I know this is crazy, but am I too late?
我知道我很扯 来不及了吗?
Yes, you're too late. Where was all this three years ago?
没错 来不及了 这些话你3年前怎么不说?
I know. I was an idiot.
我知道 我是个白痴
And I tried to forget you. I really did.
我也想忘记你 真的
Y'know after we had lunch last year I spent six months in Africa trying to get you out of my head!
我们去年吃完饭 我跑去非洲待了6个月想忘记你
- What were you doing in Africa? - Working with blind kids.
你去非洲做什么? 帮助盲童
What are you doing to me?
你折磨我嘛
Look, I
怎么说呢
I'm sorry, but it's not gonna happen.
很抱歉 我们之问是不可能的
That's fine. I'll walk away. And I'll never bother you again.
好 我会离闲 再也不会来烦你
Only if you tell me Chandler's willing to give you everything I am.
但前提是 你要告诉我 钱德也愿意给你这一切
Well, he is. I mean
他愿意
marriage is all he talks about.
没错 他成天把婚姻挂在嘴边
My goodness.
老天
In fact, I'm the one making him wait.
事实上是我在让他等
- You are? - Yeah.
是吗? 对
- Why? - Why?
为什么?
Because of the government.
因为政府的阴谋
Isn't it incredible?
很棒吧?
Monica and Chandler are getting married.
摩妮卡和钱德要结婚了
I know. They'll be so happy together.
就是啊 他们会很幸福
I mean two best friends falling in love, how often does that happen?
两个最要好的朋友坠入爱河 这种机率有多大?
- Not that often. - No.
并不太大 没错
I'm so happy for them.
我好替他们开心
Me too. So happy for them.
我也是 好开心
I'm so happy and not at all jealous.
我很高兴 毫无嫉妒之心
- Oh, no! God, definitely not jealous.
没错!当然没有
I'm probably 98 percent happy and maybe 2 percent jealous.
我可能是百分之98开心 百分之2嫉妒
What's 2 percent? That's nothing.
百分之2等于没有
Totally.
没错
- I'm like 90-10. - Yeah. Me too.
我是9比1 我也是
Hey, have you guys seen Chandler?
你们有见到钱德吗?
no, but y'know who did stop in here looking for you.
没有 但你知道谁来找过你吗?
Tennille.
坦妮尔
So that marriage stuff you were saying yesterday?
关于婚姻 你昨天说的那些话
- You don't really believe that. - Sure, I do.
应该不是真心话吧? 当然是
In fact, I think the whole concept of marriage is unnatural.
事实上我觉得婚姻本身 就很不近人情
Look at pigs. Let's take a second here and look at pigs.
你看猪嘛 我们来看一下猪
Pigs don't mate for life.
猪不会有固定配偶
A pig can have 100 sexual partners in a lifetime.
猪的一生可以有一百个性伴侣
And that's just an ordinary pig, not even a pig that's good at sports.
那还只是普通的猪 而不是擅长运动的猪
Wait a minute.
等一下
Are you honestly telling me that-that you may never want to get married?
你是说 你可能 永远都不想结婚?
Well, never say never but y'know probably
话不能说死 不过应该是
yeah, never.
永远不会
Oh, my God.
天哪
Then what are we even doing? What is this?
那我们在干什么? 现在是怎样?
what is all this pressure?
干嘛对我施压?
Is this some new kind of strategy?
这是某种新策略吗?
Why don't you put down your copy of The Rules, huh, man-trap?
你别再搞尔虞我诈那一套了
You know what? I gotta go.
你知道吗?我要走了
It's okay. I got a plan.
放心 我自有打算
- We're gonna find love. - Definitely.
我们会找到真爱的 -定会的
Yeah, I'm pretty confident about that.
我对这点有信心
That's what makes it so easy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler!
所以我可以有八成 替摩妮卡和钱德高兴
- Would be nice to have a guarantee. - What do you mean?
不过要是有保障就好了 什么意思?
Some people make deals with a friend.
有些人不是会跟朋友约定
like if neither of them are married by the time they're 40, they marry each other.
要是两个人到了40都还单身 他们就结婚
- You mean a backup? - Exactly.
你是指备胎? 没错
Yeah, yeah. I've got that.
我已经找好了
- You do?
你找好了?
- Who? - Joey?
是谁? 乔伊
- Joey? Are you serious? - Yeah.
乔伊?真的? 对
Yeah, I locked him in years ago.
真的 我好几年前就锁定他了
Wait. If neither of you are married by the time you're 40, you're gonna marry Joey.
所以要是你们40岁都还单身 你就嫁给乔伊
Yep. We shook on it.
对 我们握手为定
Yeah. But believe me, that is not how he wanted to seal the deal.
不过他可不想就此打住
Seriously?
是吗?
I think his exact words were
对 他说的是
Charming.
真迷人
he's just a backup.
他只是个备胎
Hey, Monica.
摩妮卡
Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
你有见到瑞秋?或是镜子吗?
It's for my boat. Cool, huh?
这是我的船长装 酷吧?
Yeah, it's great.
很酷
What's the matter? Talk to the captain.
怎么了?告诉船长吧
I'm just having one of those days where you realize you're in a dead-end relationship!
我发现这段成情又是死路一条
Chandler's giving you a hard time?
钱德欺负你是吧?
It's not like I want to get married tomorrow! It's just that I-I'd like to believe
我又不是明天就要结婚 我只是想知道
that I'm in a relationship that's actually going somewhere,that I'm not just wasting my time!
我不是在原地打转 浪费时问
- You know Chandler. - No, I don't know Chandler.
你也了解钱德 我已经不了解钱德了
Not anymore. It's like something's changed.
完全不了解 彷佛有什么事变了
Maybe you changed.
也许是你变了?
I didn't change.
我才没变
Maybe that's the problem.
也许问题就在这里
- What? - Chandler is a complex fellow.
什么? 钱德很复杂
One who is unlikely to take a wife.
不太可能娶妻
What does he think? Does he think I'm just gonna wait around for nothing?
他在想什么? 他以为我会空等下去吗?
Face it. Chandler is against marriage.
面对现实吧 钱德反对婚姻
And always will be.
他是不会变了
Well, there's some people who do want to marry me.
有些人可是真心想娶我
- There are? - Yeah. Richard.
有吗? 有 理查
Richard said he wants to marry you?
理查说他想娶你?
- And-and Chandler's tellin' ya how much he hates marriage?! - That's right.
而钱德说他痛恨婚姻? 没错
Chandler loves marriage!
钱德热爱婚姻!
You just told me he hates marriage!
你刚才说他痛恨婚姻!
That he's a complex fellow who's unlikely to take a wife!
说他很复杂 不太可能娶妻!
That he's against marriage and always will be!
说他反对婚姻 而且永远不会变!
You got that from what I said?
你的解读是这样?
- Rach. - Hey, you.
瑞秋 师哥
- Hey, come on in. - Thank you.
请进 谢谢
Hey y'know, I'm so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth.
很遗憾你跟伊丽莎白分手了
Thanks. Yeah, I really thought we'd be able to make it work.
谢谢 我以为 我们能克服万难 不过
I guess it just wasn't meant to be.
这大概是命中注定的
Yeah. Love.
是啊 爱情
It's a tricky business, isn't it?
爱情真是微妙
I guess so.
是啊
So, what do you say we make a pact?
我们要不要来做个约定
f you and I are both single by the time we're 40, we get married.
要是我们到了40都还单身 我们就结婚
I mean, we know each other, we like each other
我们已经熟悉、喜欢对方
we've already slept together, so there'll be no surprises there.
我们已经上过床 不会有意外
No, like, "What's that?"
不会觉得"搞什么?"
- Oh, you want me to be your backup. - Exactly.
你想找我当备胎? 没错
Oh, yeah. I already have one.
可是我已经有备胎了
- Who? - Phoebe.
谁? 菲比
Phoebe?
菲比?
But she just said Joey is her backup.
但是她说乔伊是她的备胎
Oh, I don't think so.
才不是呢
Ross! I just had a conversation with her, and she said that she and Joey made a deal!
罗斯 我刚跟她聊过 她说她和乔伊约好了
That's impossible. We have had a deal for years.
不可能的 我们几年前早就约好了
We shook on it.
还握手为定
Although, believe me, she wanted to do a lot more than that.
只不过她觉得握手还不够
Where the hell have you been?!
你跑到哪儿去了?
I was making a coconut phone with the Professor.
我在跟教授做椰子电话
Richard told Monica he wants to marry her.
理查跟摩妮卡说他想娶她
- What? - I've been trying to find you
什么? 就是啊 我直在找你
to tell to stop messing with her
叫你别玩了!
and maybe I would have if these damn boat shoes wouldn't keep flying off!
可是这双鞋子跑一跑就掉!
- Oh, my God! - I know! They suck!
我的天啊 就是啊 烂死了!
He's not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! I'm supposed to do that!
他不该向我的女朋友求婚! 该求婚的人是我!
- I know!
我知道
Y'know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go over there; I'm gonna kick his ass!
你知道吗?我要去找他 好好教训他一顿
Will you help me?
你愿意帮忙吗?
Look, Chandler I don't think us getting our asses kicked is a solution.
钱德 被他海扁一顿不是办法
Okay?
知道吗?
- Look, just go and find Monica. - You're right.
赶快去找摩妮卡吧 你说的对 好
I'm gonna get the ring
我去拿戒指
I'll go find her
我要找到她
I'm just going to propose!
直接向她求婚!
Dude! Dude! Dude!
老兄!老兄!老兄!
Let me know about that coconut phone, it might great for the boat.
你的椰子电话 也许很适合摆在船上
Hi.
嘿
Hi
嘿
I don't know why I'm here.
我不知道我来干什么
I didn't ask.
我又没问
You want to come in?
你要进来吗?
I don't know.
不知道
Oh, okay.
好吧
I'll just leave the door open and go sit on the couch.
那我把门开着 回去坐下
Chandler is such an idiot!
钱德真是个白痴!
Drink?
要喝点酒吗?
Yeah, I'll have a scotch,on the rocks with a twist?
好 我要威士′忌加 冰块和莱姆片?
I remember.
我记得
- You still smoking cigars?
还在抽雪茄?
No, no. That's art.
没有 那是艺术
If it bothers you, I can put my art out.
如果你不喜欢 我可以把艺术熄掉
No, that's okay.
没关系
So, Monica
摩妮卡
let me ask you a question.
我问你一件事
Since we broke up, do you ever
我们分手后
think about me?
你想过我吗?
Actually, I thought about you a couple months ago.
我两个月前还想到你
- Really? - Yeah, but it's because I
是吗? 不过是因为
had an eye exam, and I don't like my new eye doctor.
我去做眼睛检查 又不喜欢我的新医生
- Who is it? - Edward Nevsky.
是谁? 爱德华奈夫斯基
Yeah, he's no good.
他的确很差
Do you ever think about me in
你有想过
a non-eye-doctor way?
非眼科医生的我吗?
No.
没有
Because getting over you was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
因为忘记你 是我这辈子做过最难的事
I never let myself think about you.
我不让自己想到你
Phoebe, you picked Joey and Ross?
菲比! 你找了乔伊和罗斯?
You can't have two backups!
你不能有两个备胎!
Of course I can.
当然可以
It's just good sense to back up your backup.
眼光独到才会替备胎找备胎
- Look, I've already lost Chandler. - What?
我已经折损钱德了 什么?
Hey, Phoebe!
喂 菲比!
Phoebe! We're both your backups?
我们都是你的备胎?
Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
菲比!你怎么可以这样?
I don't - Look I don't know what you're complaining about now? You were both aware of the situation!
我不知道你们在抱怨什么 你们都知道这个状况
- I was not! - No, we weren't!
我们不知道 我不知道!
This kind of back talk isn't gonna fly when we're married.
婚后你们可不能这样顶嘴
Phoebe you can't have both of them! You have to pick one!
菲比 你不能独占他们 你得选一个
- Pick me! - No, pick me!
选我! 不 选我!
I don't want to end up an old maid.
我不想当老处女
Well, let's see.
好吧 我看看
Ross is a good father.
罗斯是个好爸爸
But
但是
Joey has a boat. This is hard.
乔伊有船 好难选喔
This is crazy. I want to switch to Rachel.
太扯了 我要换成瑞秋
I wanna switch to Rachel too!
我也要换成瑞秋
No, wait! Okay, just wait!
不 等一下!等一下!
Wait, guys. Don't make any rash decisions.
你们别急着做决定
Remember my promise:
记得我的承诺吧?
If we get married, three times a week.
结婚之后 1星期3次
Oh, my God. Phoebe
天哪 菲比
I'm talking about massages.
我是在说按摩
No, I'm not.
我不是
Okay, y'know what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All right here, this is what we're gonna do!
我知道该怎么解决了 办法就是
I'm gonna write Joey
我在一张纸巾上
on one napkin.
写"乔伊"
And I'm going to write "Ross" on the other napkin
一张纸巾上写"罗斯"
and we are going to pick one!
然后我们一人选一张
That person will be our backup. Here we go.
那个人就是我们的备胎
That sounds fair. All right.
很公平 那好
Good. Switching them up.
我来弄乱
- Pick one. - Left.
选边 左边
- Thank you. - You're welcome.
谢谢 不客气
- Ross. - Joey.
罗斯 乔伊
- We should just switch. - Absolutely.
我们交换好了 没错
I miss this apartment.
我想念这问房子
Now, this is a grownup's apartment.
这才是大人的房子
- I should be with a grownup, do you know what I mean?! - Yeah.
我应该跟大人在一起 你懂吧
You're saying you need to be with someone more mature.
懂啊 你是说 你要跟比较成熟的人在一起
Maybe someone with
也许是一个
a license to practice medicine.
有医师执照的人
Or a mustache.
或是有胡子的人
Let's face it. I'm not a kid anymore.
说真的 我不是小孩子了
-I need to be with someone who-who wants the same things that I do!
我需要一个目标相同的人
Coming to my work and telling me you love me, I want that!
来我工作的地方跟我示爱 我要的是那样!
Talking about pig sex over lunch, I don't want that!
吃饭时聊猪的性爱 我不要那样!
I think that's fair.
很公平
Fair? Please. Don't even talk to me about fair.
公平?别跟我提公平
Fair would've been you wanting to marry me back then.
公平的意思是 当年你想娶我
Or fair would've been Chandler wanting to marry me now!
或是钱德现在想娶我
Believe me, nothing about this is fair. Nothing.
真的 这整件事一点也不公平
- Nothing! Nothing! - It's okay.
不公平!不公平!不公平 别激动
Nothing.
不公平
I don't know.
不知道
I don't know.
我不知道
I know.
我知道
I have to figure
我得先把事情
some stuff, before I can
想清楚 然后才能
Yeah, I understand.
我懂
Take as much time as you want.
你只管慢漫想
Ten, 20 minutes, if you need it.
10分钟、20分钟都行
I'll be here. Not smoking.
我会在这里 不会抽烟
- Chandler. - Where is she?
钱德 她人呢?
I'm not scared of you.
我可不怕你
She's not here. And please come in.
她不在 请进
Scotch on the rocks
威士 忌加冰
with a twist, on a coaster.
和莱姆片 放在杯垫上?
Monica? Monica?
摩妮卡 摩妮卡!
Okay, she was here. But she left.
好吧 她来过 又走了
Where did she go?
她去哪里?
She said she had to think things over.
她说 她要想清楚
Oh, my God. I can't believe this. I thought you were a good guy.
天哪 我真不敢相信 我以为 我以为你是个好人
Oh, hey. Look, nothing happened.
我们又没怎样
Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didn't tell my girlfriend that you love her?
没怎样?没怎样? 你没跟我女朋友示爱?
Well, all right, one thing happened.
好吧 只有这样
I can't believe this! Do you know what you did?
你知道你做了什么事吗?
My girlfriend is out there thinking things over!
我的女朋友在想事情
You made my girlfriend think!
你让我的女朋友思考!
Well, I'm sorry.
我很抱歉
What's to think about? I love her.
她还需要想什么?我爱她
Well, apparently I'm willing to offer her things that you are not.
我愿意给她 你不愿意给的东西
I'm willing to offer her all those things. This was just a plan.
但是我愿意给 我只是
A way to throw her off course so that when I offered her all these things, she'd be surprised!
故意要让她失望 等真相大白 她就会很惊喜
If it helps, it worked very well.
效果真的很好
It was working till you showed up, you big tree.
直到你半路杀出来 水泥墙
This isn't fair.
这样不公平
You had your chance with her, and you blew it!
你曾经有机会 你曾经有机会!结果你搞砸了
And this is my chance and I am not going to blow it
现在轮到我了 我不会搞砸
because we are meant for each other.
因为我们是天生一对
And this has all just been one stupid mistake!
而这一切只是个愚蠢的错误
I was gonna propose tonight.
我本来打算今晚求婚的
You were gonna propose?
你要求婚?
Yeah, I even
对 我还
got a ring.
准备了戒指
Did you get a ring?
你有吗?
No, I don't have a ring.
没有 我没准备
You go get her Chandler.
你去找她吧 钱德
And can I give you a piece of advice?
我可以给你一个忠告吗?
If you do get her
要是你得到她
don't let her go.
一定要好好把握
Trust me.
相信我
You know, Richard, you are a good guy.
理查 你的确是个好人
I know.
我知道
I hate that.
真讨厌
- Dude.I can't talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
钱德 持会儿再说 我得去找摩妮卡
She's gone.
她走了
- What? - She's gone. She had a bag and she left.
什么? 她走了 提着个包包走了
- What are you talking about? - She was all crying.
你在说什么? 她哭得很伤心
She-she said you guys want different things, and that and that she needed time to think.
说你们要的东西不一样 说她需要时问思考
Well why didn't you stop her?! Why didn't you just tell her it was a plan?!
你为什么不栏住她? 不说出我的计划?
I did! I told her everything. She wouldn't believe me.
我有啊 我都说了 钱德 但是她不信
Well, where ?
那她
Where did she go?
她上哪儿去了?
To her parent's I think and she said you shouldn't call her.
她父母家吧 我想 她叫你不要打给她
But if I were you, I would.
要是我就会打
Can't believe I ruined this.
我居然搞砸了
I am so sorry, man.
我很遗憾
You wanted it to be a surprise.
你希望是个惊喜的
Oh, my God.
天哪
Chandler
钱德
in all my life
我这辈子
I never thought I would be so lucky
从来没想过我会这么幸运
as to fall in love with my best
可以 爱上我最要好的
My best
我最要好的
- There's a reason why girls don't do this! - Okay, okay, okay.
所以说都是男人在求婚的嘛! 好好好
I'll do it. I thought
我来 我以为
Wait, I can do this.
等等 我一定行
I thought that it mattered
我以为 开口的
what I said or where I said it.
时间地点很重要
Then I realized
后来才发现
the only thing that matters is that you
唯一重要的是你
You make me happier than I ever thought I could be.
你让我得到超乎想像的幸福
And if you let me
所以如果你愿意
I will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way.
我愿意用下半生 让你跟我一样幸福
Monica
摩妮卡
will you marry me?
你愿意嫁给我吗?
Yes.
我愿意
I knew you were likely to take a wife!
我就知道你应该会娶妻!
Can we come in yet? We're dying out here!
可以进去了吗?我们快愁死了!
Come in! Come in!
进来!进来!
We're engaged!
我们订婚了!
This is the least jealous I've ever been!
这是我最不嫉妒的时候!
Oh, no, wait! This is wrong! Ross isn't here!
等等 不行啦!罗斯不在!
He's done it three times. He knows what it's about!
他都玩三次了 知道这是怎么回事!